I like to think that I’m your average Subaru owner. I enjoy taking my Legacy station wagon canoeing, wind surfing and bicycle riding. I have a small family, a dog and live in a country with four months of icy and snowy winter. But mostly I like to think that I’m your average Subaru owner because if I’m not I might be a bit of a poser. And to a child who skateboarded in the early 1990s, that’s just about the worst thing you can be called.

Unfortunately Subaru recently restyled the Legacy, Outback and Forester models, and I can’t stand them.

Subaru has decided not to sell the wagon version of the new Legacy in North America, meaning it is only available as a four-door sedan. The new model is awkwardly styled and huge — parking my 2009 Legacy next to a 2010 is akin to seating an Ewok next to a Wookie. I can’t understand why anyone would buy one.

If you want to drive a wagon — and I do — you will now need to shell out the extra cash for the Outback, which is like the Legacy but doesn’t handle as well. This is thanks to being placed on tall, monster-truck like suspension with more plastic bits glued onto it than a plastic F/A18 Hornet model. Not my cup of tea!

The current Forester may be the biggest let down. Since its introduction in 1997 the Forester has been the “anti-SUV.” All the space and ability of something like a Honda CRV or Toyota RAV4 but none of the silly “mini-SUV” style. One could still drive it without feeling like a soccer mom. However, in the latest iteration Subaru abandoned the Forester’s uniqueness and built a CRV/RAV4 clone. Facepalms all around then.

But what do I know? Motortrend named the 2010 Outback its “SUV of the year” and my local Subaru dealer tells me that they can’t order enough Foresters.

Apparently I’m not your average Subaru owner, since their current direction — which was no-doubt influenced by market research — is 180 degrees from a car I would buy, which can mean only one thing: I am a poser. All those kids at the skateboarding park were right after all.