2012 in comedic review

3. Nineteenth century fresco painting ruined (Aug. 22, 2012)

When you come to find that your 200-year-old painting of Jesus Christ is in need of a little restoration, I know what obviously comes to mind first: why should I pay thousands of dollars for a costly restoration of a beautiful 19th century work of art when I can simply do it myself?

Well, before you pick up a copy of “Historical Art Restoration for Dummies” and a paintbrush, please think back to the “Ecce Homo” fiasco.

In August of last year an 80-year-old Spanish woman named Cecilia Giménez took it upon herself to attempt a restoration of a 19th century fresco by painter Elias Garcia Martinez in a small church in her town. The result was a horrendous blob that resembled something closer to a monkey rather than the original subject of Jesus Christ. The Internet promptly changed the name of the painting from “Ecce Homo,” which means “Behold the Man,” to “Ecce Mono,” which translates to “Behold the Monkey.”

On the bright side, though, Giménez’s paintings are now selling on eBay for thousands of dollars. Way to go, Spanish lady!

2. Tuxedo Stan runs for mayor of Halifax (Sept. 17, 2012)

Back in September a furry black and white feline aptly named Tuxedo Stan clawed his way into the race for mayor in Halifax, NS, and vowed that he was ready to pounce on the issue of stray cats in the area.

Running as the candidate nominated for the Tuxedo Party, Stan was able to collect endorsements from celebrities such as Ellen DeGeneres and Anderson Cooper. Although Tuxedo Sam couldn’t actually be elected to office due to municipal laws, he was able to raise awareness for animal welfare in Halifax.

What’s so ridiculous about a cat running for mayor, really? After all, Stubbs the cat—mayor of Alaskan town Talkeetna—just celebrated his 15th year in office. Some might believe that Tuxedo Stan the cat could possibly do a better job as mayor than our own Sam Katz from Tuxedo…

1. Monkey lost in Toronto Ikea parking lot (Dec. 9, 2012)

This story is easily my number one pick as it was honestly my entire motivation for writing this article.

The long and short of this story is that Torontonian Yasmin Nakhuda had a pet monkey named Darwin whom she (for some unknown reason) brought along with her during a shopping trip and left in her car while she went into Ikea. Darwin let himself out of his cage and proceeded to wander around the store’s parking lot before entering the store itself, which lead to Toronto Animal Services being called and the monkey being seized by the municipal government.

Now Darwin is located at a primate sanctuary in Sunderland, Ontario, while Nakhuda awaits a court case to decide the monkey’s fate.

I’m not quite sure what is most hilarious about this story – that there was a monkey named Darwin loose in an Ikea in Toronto wearing a shearling coat and a diaper, or the bounty of hilarious memes that followed this incident including a composite of Jared Leto, Kanye West, and Ryan Gosling sporting shearling coats alongside Darwin. Either way, I will continue to be amused by @IkeaMonkey on Instagram for months to come while the world awaits a verdict for Darwin and hopes for his safety and well-being.