Heat wave
Hot-blooded, check it and see
BEN POGGEMILLER STAFF
Let’s take the high road and call Winnipeg winters “brisk.” Who am I kidding, if you take the archetypal view of hell and invert it, you have an old-fashioned prairie winter. I’m not dreading winter because of the cold, however; I’ve become desensitized to cold after I spent an entire winter working at Red River Co-op, pumping gas, wiping windshields, and convincing customers that the gas prices were not a sign of the apocalypse. I remember when the anti-freeze froze. You could literally take a ball of anti-freeze from the squeegee buckets and throw it at somebody, no joke. No, this winter I will be dreading the heat.
Some of you may have noticed this, males especially. You’re at school and you’re walking from the bus stop or parking lot and it’s a “brisk” winter day, approximately 30 degrees below absolute zero. Your toes are about to fall off when you walk into a building and it hits you: the temperature has changed by roughly 1,000 degrees and you’re sweating profusely. When I’m waiting for a class, I often wish I had waited outside because by the time the class starts, my shirt has armpit stains and my back is wet. While every building is pretty bad, here are some of the worst locations on campus.
E2
The engineering building is usually fairly comfortable, except for the lowest level. That’s where they stick all the computer science classes, probably because we feel most comfortable where there isn’t any natural light. We might be able to escape fresh air, but we can’t escape the heat. I would compare this building to a sauna.
Buller
I can’t stand Buller. Aside from that gassy smell that wafts through the building, it’s hot enough in those hallways to melt gold. I always have to bring a water bottle, because after one class in Buller, I lose several litres of body moisture.
The tunnels
Not only is it impossible to walk through the tunnel between University Centre and Armes with a jacket on, but it’s also impossible to make it through in one day. I often find myself having to curl up under the pipes, rest from heat stroke, and attempt the rest of the journey the next day. I usually don’t stay long, as there’s gila monsters hiding under there. I guess they feel at home in the tunnels. There’s actually hot wind blowing on your face to further that desert atmosphere.
I usually plan my route now to walk half outside and half inside to balance the extreme temperatures. I could be the only one though. Maybe nobody else feels the same way, but sometimes the gila monsters start talking to me, and they find it a bit warm as well.
